A week doing death duties

And so the sadness continues.  I picked up a text on Monday morning while we were driving to Melton and it was from Sue to say that her dad has passed away in the early hours.  Poor Bill has really been suffering and he was not in a good way when I last saw him on Saturday afternoon so there was a little part of me that was relieved to learn that he was finally at peace.  He was certainly a character and I hadn’t known him in his glory days.  I felt for Sue though; she’d left the hospital at 2am to go home to catch us a couple hours sleep having been by his bedside for 22 hours solid.  She got home and hadn’t even got to bed when she got the call asking her to come back to the hospital.  Unfortunately she was too late as Bill had already passed away.  At least Sue’s dad has no more pain and really I do not know how much longer Sue could have watched her dad suffer.  Sometimes enough really is enough. 

Mum seemed okay when we reached the bungalow but this wasn’t to last long; although I’d written the eulogy and Phil had edited, I had to show it to mum to see if she was happy with what was going to be said at the service.  Mum doesn’t read so well so I read it out loud to her.  I nearly made it to the end before I started to bawl and this set her off. Sad news and tears all before half nine on a Monday morning, certainly not a good start to the week.

But I knew Monday would be tough and that we’d all have to get through as best we could.  I showed mum the montage boards which she seemed to like and she and I wrote some captions to accompany the photographs whilst Phil got stuck into some DIY.   In the few hours that she has been left alone since George died, Bet is certain that friends will come back to the house after the wake, and being very house-proud, she has decided that she wants the bungalow in tip top condition.  This is fair enough; things have been neglected since dad took ill and I thought a spring clean was a good idea.  It will give her something to focus on and I am also better with a project.  It can’t be said the same for Phil, which is a shame because most of the DIY jobs are ones that only he can do.

After the boards, mum and I had to choose a set of clothes to take into the funeral directors.  I had to smile to myself because she picked a very old pair of trousers and a shirt that had seen better days together with a zipped jumper which was all bobbly from washing.  George certainly had much better quality clothes in his wardrobe but I had to let Bet choose. Into the plastic bag went pants and socks and freshly polished slippers. 

After lunch we went to the council offices to register the death. This wasn’t too bad, we had all the necessary documentation and Phil answered all the questions on mum’s behalf and this worked quite well.  Well, as well as could be expected in the circumstances.   Our visit to the funeral directors to deliver the clothes and discuss the finer details wasn’t so easy.  We had ordered book marks instead of a formal order of service and had to decide on a verse.  I suggested the poem ‘Death is nothing at all’ by Henry Scott Holland and the lady in the office printed off the verse and gave it to mum to read.  This brought on more tears which was not really surprising given that it is quite sad to read. 

George wasn’t a religious man so we had decided to use a funeral celebrant instead of a vicar.  Tara came round at half past three and we all liked her.  Tara’s granddad was a prisoner of war like George so that gave us something in common.  We gave her the typed tribute for George which she skimmed through and we talked through the order of service.  When Tara left I drove back to MK leaving Phil behind to stay with mum.  It had felt like a very long day and I was knackered by the time I got back to MK.

I was awake very early on Tuesday morning and decided to stop off and pick up some stuff from the Oldbrook flat.  I was dismayed to see the gate was broken and 2 of the fence panels had blown down.  I also wasn’t happy to see that the downstairs tenant had parked in my parking space. Another crap start to the day.  I was in the gym before half seven and round at Rachel’s house for my hair appointment.  She did me some low lights which are okay but I am not so happy with the cut.  Never mind it will grow I guess.

I caught up with domestics and paperwork and finished the day having a cup of tea with Sue.  Poor girl, she’d just got back from registering her dad’s death and was pretty wrung out.   I find it a weird coincidence that Phil’s dad and her dad died within 4 days of each other.  Still, I suppose this means that we completely understand what the other is going through and can give the other support if the need arises.

Phil left Melton early on Wednesday morning and arrived back at the flat at quarter past nine in a foul mood. The journey home had taken him 2 hours; the only reason he’d come back in the morning was for a 10.20 am appointment with the doctor.  I made him a cup of tea and then took myself over to Sue’s as I’d promised her that I would go with her to the funeral directors in Newport.  She’d said she was happy to go by herself but I insisted on going along for moral support. Bill will be cremated at the Crownhill Crematorium on Friday the 31^st of May.

I had 2 appointments at the dentist in the afternoon, one with the dentist for a check-up and the other with the hygienist. The check-up was fine and I don’t need any treatment but apparently I have problem with pockets in my gums and need to have some deep cleaning.  I am going to have this done over 4 appointments, 1 each month. I could have it done in just one appointment but I am not that brave.  Wednesday dinner was a delicious salmon supper at Sue’s, with wine lots of.  I think the intention was to drown our sorrows and this we accomplished.

Phil has been busy in Melton sorting out not only the bungalow but also the financial side of his dad’s estate.  He and mum had to get papers signed at Lloyds, Melton Mowbray Building Society and Nationwide.  George had an ISA with Nationwide and Phil ended up having to get a solicitor to sign a form for Nationwide to release the ISA’s.  Thankfully, we do not have to complete probate.

Phil went back to Melton on Thursday morning.  He didn’t leave until after nine and apparently he had another nightmare journey.  I went to the gym and afterwards shopping for suitable funeral attire.  I found a little black dress in H&M and a black blazer which will do for dad’s funeral next Tuesday and Sue’s dad’s funeral service the following week.  Let’s hope these are the only 2 funerals this year that I will attend.

I feel a bit down today and had to drag myself out of my bed this morning.  I didn’t have the energy or the inclination to go the gym so I decided to give it a miss.  In fact I have done sod all today bar visiting Sue for a chat late morning.  I did take the Landrover to the garage for a valet but that’s about it.  I decided that I wasn’t going to blog first thing because I am very aware that my thoughts, which translate into blog posts are not only depressing, but also, are not very much fun to read at this moment in time. But writing this blog is cathartic and found myself drafting this afternoon without even thinking about what I was doing.  Hopefully life will brighten up soon and I will feel lighter, but if not, I may have no option but to take a blogging break.  

The Circle of Life

My plan for Saturday was to keep busy and keep busy I did, well certainly for the first part of the day; I wrote Dad’s eulogy, posted a blog and was at the health club working out by half past nine.  After DW I did a big shop at Asda and was back at the flat for midday.  I was expecting to do a spot of lunch for Sue to give her a short respite from visiting her dad in hospital but she phoned to say that she couldn’t leave him so I went to see her at ward 15.  As it happened, Sue ended up buying my lunch, because aside from spare change for parking, I didn’t have any money.

Bill, Sue’s dad wasn’t doing too well.  He seemed to remember who I was but I am not so sure.  It was upsetting to see how much he has deteriorated.  Poor Bill was in an anxious state. He was on an IV drip for antibiotics and a morphine drip for pain relief.  There wasn’t much I could do but keep Sue Company by his bedside.   Her dad didn’t really have a high level of consciousness and was being sick constantly.  I am not sure that keeping a 10 hour bedside vigil is doing much for Sue but she feels that she has to be there just in case. I understand this.  I left when Sue’s sons Stuart & Matt turned up and came away from the hospital feeling pretty useless.  I seemed to feel useless quite a lot these days.

One of my funeral duties was to organise the music for dad’s funeral.  George was really into um-papa German music and Phil’s mum had given me their one and only CD which she had rescued from dad’s car.  Obviously it isn’t my cup of tea so I’ve no idea why it made me cry whilst en-route to the gym as I whizzed through the tracks.   By the time I arrived at the Stadium I had pretty much decided on track 12.  Job done.

When I left the hospital it tipped it down and although I still had lots of things on the ‘to do’ list I decided to drive straight home.  I felt overwhelmed with sadness; I don’t know whether it was a delayed reaction to dad passing or whether seeing Sue’s dad suffering and also Sue but I felt very down in the dumps on Saturday afternoon.  I didn’t know whether Phil was coming back to MK so I just sat in the flat and waiting for him.  He did phone to say that he was leaving at quarter past 3 so I could relax a bit then.  I had half expecting Phil to bring mum back but she insisted she was fine to stay home alone.  As it turned out she wasn’t; as I have voiced before, hindsight is a very valuable thing.

Phil wasn’t in the best frame of minds when he got home but only to be expected I guess in view of the fact that he has just lost his dad.  Factor into the equation the hour and an half drive home plus his mum’s tears then you get the picture that it wasn’t a terribly happy household at ours on Saturday evening.  Emma my ex-neighbour touched my heart when she sent me a text to say that she and the family were going to a church service and she said that she would light a candle for George.  How sweet was that?? In fact I must say thank you to all our friends and family that have sent messages of support, it is very touching to know that people are thinking of us.

Unfortunately Saturday night didn’t get any better because I received a text from Sue to say that the doctor had seen her dad and she was told that his organs were closing down.  I did offer to go to the hospital and give her some support, because that’s what friends are for but Matt & Stuart were going back in so she okay. Well not okay but at least not alone.

Sue and her dad Bill were very much on my mind when I awoke at 4am on Sunday morning.  I got up and made a cup of tea but unfortunately I didn’t go back to sleep.  We had a shit load of things to do so both Phil & I were up by half six doing stuff.  I sorted the photographs and put together the montage boards ready for the funeral.  Phil was pleased with them when I’d finished but the whole process was upsetting. 

Sue sent me a text to say that she had received a call from the hospital asking her to come to the hospital so that she could be with her dad’s for his final hours at 3.45am.  Another early bird.   I really felt for her because George passed quickly and without pain and I so wished the same for her dad.  Again there wasn’t much I could do.  We kept in touch by text yesterday and the last text from her last night said that Bill was still alive but deteriorating.  Her intention was to stay with him throughout the night.  I have heard anything this morning.

Phil & I packed the car ready yesterday to go down to Melton today, I had intended to go to the gym but I didn’t have the inclination.   Phil invited Jim who was home alone because Shirley is in Australia to come over for Sunday lunch and to watch the Spanish Grand Prix.  My first inclination was to cancel him but actually it was a welcomed distraction and a chance for Phil to enjoy something ‘normal’.  The boys watched the race whilst I cooked the dinner.  I’d also invited Harriet over for lunch because I hadn’t seen her since before we went away on holiday.  She turned up with Mitzi, the little dog that she is looking after whilst her friend Jenny is away on holiday in India for 3 weeks.

Lunch was alright and pretty chilled out, which I think is just what me and Phil needed.  It was nice to see Jim and catch up with all of the Robb news.  Overall a good day yesterday with a Sunday roast, a few drinks, good company and just what the doctor ordered.

George

It has to be said, that we have had a dreadful week. Tuesday started off okay, I was up at 5am, managed to write and publish a blog and was on the road to Melton just after 7am.  The traffic was awful in every direction and it took me over 2 hours to get to mum and dad’s bungalow.   I arrived to find both mum and dad in a dreadful state.  Poor Bett was both physically and mentally exhausted, over the last 6 weeks George’s mobility has deteriorated and the physical exertion of looking after him has taken its toll.   It didn’t help that George was suffering from sickness and diarrhoea which meant lots of effort getting him of out his chair and onto the loo.

George looked dreadful; his legs and tummy were swollen with water and he couldn’t get comfortable in his chair.  I took mum for a quick shopping trip to Tesco’s and then called the surgery and asked from a home visit from the doctor.  Bett was reluctant for me to make the call because she was worried that the doctor would send him back to the hospital.  I decided to take the risk.

The doctor came out just after we’d cleared away lunch and was very good. He examined George thoroughly and then asked if there was somewhere we could talk privately.  We went into the main bedroom, the doc sat on the bed, mum sat on the commode and I sat on the stool under the hairdryer.  I sensed that what he was going to tell us wouldn’t be good news and I was right.  Basically he told mum & me that George’s heart was failing and that his organs were shutting down. He asked if we had discussed ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ with George.  Nobody had mentioned this to us before and it was the mention of this that made mum realise that George was actually dying and would not recover.  She sobbed her little heart out in the bedroom and it was all I could do to keep it together for her sake.

The doctor tried to talk to George about being resuscitated should he have a heart attack but George was too confused to give him an answer; in the end the doctor signed the form on his behalf.  I have to say the doctor that came out was brilliant with both mum and dad.  The doctor said he was going to arrange for the MacMillan team and the District Nurses to visit. He also asked me to go to the surgery later in the afternoon to collect end of life injections which I duly did before I left Melton.

After the doctor left, mum was very upset and I had no choice but to have a very frank conversation with her.  I felt very guilty waving her goodbye when I left to go home.  Of course I had to fill Phil in with the events of the day and we agreed that he should visit before the end of the week.  The worry of George & Bett stayed with me all the following day and I couldn’t summon the energy for anything.  I did manage a half-hearted workout at the gym and dropped off a few bits and pieces for the OB flat but it was all an effort.  Really I should have got on with the glossing at the flat but I just couldn’t be arsed.  Most unlike me.  Sue had been at the hospital with her dad for most of the day and we decided that we wouldn’t get together for our usual Wednesday night rendezvous.  This was probably a good decision because I don’t think I would have been very good company.

I felt more my usual self on Thursday and had a good workout at DW.  I walked back into the flat mid-morning to find Phil on the phone to his mum.  She had called in floods of tears to tell Phil that dad was being sick and was making funny noises with his breathing.  Phil called the District Nurse who said that she would go round as soon as possible.  We phoned mum back and then waited.  In hindsight, we should have packed a bag and drove to Melton there and then but we didn’t.  Sometime before midday we phoned to see if the District Nurse was there and thankfully she was but it wasn’t good news. The nurse told Phil that he needed to get there as soon as possible.

I decided to stay behind and I was grateful that Sue, on a brief break from visiting her dad in hospital, popped round for a cup of tea.  She was there when I took the call from Phil to tell me that his dad had died at 1pm.  It’s funny, I knew that George’s days were numbered but it came as a shock to hear that he’d passed. The sad thing is, that Phil was too late, there was an accident on the M1 and he didn’t get to the bungalow until half one.  It was a godsend that the District Nurse was there with Bett and able to give George an injection of morphine and also an injection to ease the congestion so that that when dad died, he was not in any pain.  The nurse stayed until Phil arrived and was the one to break the news to Phil, she also called the doctor out.

Of course as soon as Phil phoned, I packed a bag and drove to Melton.  The undertaker was there when I arrived and George had already been collected and taken to the funeral parlour or wherever they take the deceased.  Naturally mum was very upset and I don’t think it helped seeing her husband of more than 60 years being carried out in a body bag.

Phil & mum made tea and tried to make light of everything but it was strange not having dad sat in his chair.  Whilst tea was cooking, I did what Claire does best; I made a list of things to do for the funeral arrangements.  I wasn’t looking forward to sleeping in dad’s double bed which was probably why we didn’t go to bed until nearly midnight.  I slept but was up before 6am.  Phil’s mum wasn’t far behind me and whilst she was in the shower, I went for a run round the block. I needed to clear my head.

Yesterday was busy, Phil phoned family and friends to let them know about George and I typed letters on my laptop.  We couldn’t get an appointment to register the death at the town hall until Monday, but we did get to the building society to get a cheque for the funeral directors and we also went to The Bowls Club to book a room and a buffet for the wake.  The funeral will take place on Tuesday the 21^st of May in the afternoon.

Phil made lunch although Phil’s mum hardly ate anything. I worry that if left by herself she won’t bother with food.  In the afternoon, Phil got the photographs down from the attic and we had a happy couple of hours talking about days gone by.  I came home last night leaving Phil to ‘mum’ sit.  He is spending the day with her and coming home tonight.  Then we are back to Melton on Monday.

I got up early this morning to write George’s eulogy; I had almost finished it then my computer crashed and I lost the whole document, because stupidly, I hadn’t saved it.  I have just finished it for the second time and now I feel doubly sad.  However, there is no time to feel sad or sorry for myself because I have a mountain of jobs to do.  I think keeping busy at this moment in time is a good plan.

Days Gone By

It’s quite hard to believe that a little over a week ago I was sitting by the pool in Corfu sipping (or is that gulping) a cold one and staring at mountains beyond the ocean.  Holidays are great aren’t they; they provide escapism from real life but once home after only a few days, they seem like a long distant memory.  Did that really happen to me, was I really there??  It’s so sad but a reality of this fast streamed life in which we live.

My new kindle arrived by courier after lunch on Thursday and I was very impressed with the service provided by Amazon.  Okay I had to lie a bit, but this saved me lying and paying out on my budget travel insurance, so it was a win-win all round. I have to confess, I also impressed myself when I logged in to Phil’s Amazon account and managed to transfer my recently purchased kindle e-books onto my old kindle.  Double result.

I made Phil do the final inspection at the Oldbrook flat with the out-of-favour agent.  He was reluctant but I dug my heels in.  Phil came back and said that the tenants who had been in for 4 years had left our flat in an excellent condition.  In fact, he said that it was in the same condition as when we first let it to them.  I doubted his word, because even with the best will in the world, wear and tear and general living causes deterioration and well, accidents do happen.  And yes, I am girl with her glass half empty but I am also realistic.  I had no high expectations.

Which was just as well, because not long after Phil left to go see his mum and dad just after 7am on Friday,  I went to the OB flat to see for myself.  On first inspection all seemed good but then when I looked closer I could see the dilapidations. Fair play to these Australian tenants it is probably the best condition that I have got a flat back.  But I am a fussy and fastidious mare and the more I looked, the more I could see that needed attention.  It wasn’t bad; I did a quick recky and made a list and then went on my merry way with a mental list of things to do kicking around in my head.

I went to Lidl to get bits and pieces for mum, from there I went to Caldecotte and dropped flat keys at Harriet’s through the letter box, bought supplies at Asda and was working out at the gym before half eight.  Not bad going even if I do say so myself.  I had a reasonable post-holiday workout and was back at the flat by half ten.  I packed our bags, made myself a baked potato for lunch and arrived at the caravan at 1pm, having stopped off at The Manor on the way to pick up the post.

It felt strange being back at the caravan; I expected to have to clear up both vans because Jan & Steve plus both their mums had stayed the weekend whilst we were on holiday but actually, you wouldn’t have known that they had been there. Steve & Jan left us a card and what looked like a couple of decent bottles of wine, bless, thank you guys and I hope you and both the mums enjoyed your stay.

I unpacked, changed beds, spoke to my neighbours and time went all too soon before Phil arrived at the van about 4pm.  Phil watched a bit of snooker and then persuaded me to go with him to the club-house.  The sun was still shining and we enjoyed a lovely walk by the lake watching the fisherman fishing but when we got the clubhouse there was a funeral wake going on for a golfing 63 year old park resident that we didn’t know and the mood was sombre.  We had a few drinks and a basket of chips and were back in the van before 7pm.

You don’t realise how close to nature you are until you sleep in the caravan.  I quite like it actually especially in late spring.  I even sleep better than I do in our centrally heated flat and so does Phil, in fact he didn’t get up until 10am last Saturday and even then I had to prise him out of bed.    Phil did a fry-up; he did bubble and squeak, baked beans, fried eggs, bacon and sausage.  We didn’t eat until late so it was almost 11am but the time we got out and on the road.

First stop was ‘The Manor’ to pick up the post and then we decided to drive and explore.  Steve told Phil about Beckworth Emporium so we went there first.  It was a mixture of delicatessen and horticulture and I loved it.  Unfortunately because it was a Bank Holiday it was really busy. We really liked the looks of the restaurant and the menu but because of our late breakfast we just were not hungry.

We drove around aimlessly trying to find that a country pub that we liked the looks of but without avail and then the skies turned grey and it began to rain; by the time we returned to the caravan it was hammering down.  Phil watched some of the snooker, because of the rain we agreed to return to the flat and I packed up.  It was weird because by the time I had everything packed up and in the boot; the sun was out in full glow.  Bummer, I was really tempted to unpack and stay on but by this time Phil had already agreed to give Harriet a lift from Caldecotte to Newport so she could go to the Sausage Fest in Sherrington.   Our Saturday night was ‘The Voice’ and ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ and then a reasonably early night.  Lights out by 9.30pm. Sad or what.

Sunday morning wasn’t an early one either. I guess it was gone 9am by the time we got to the flat.  It took me an hour and an half to clean the kitchen, just the routine stuff, grease and grim from the top of the wall units and a blast of bleach in every nook and cranny.  It took Phil about the same time to clean the windows inside and out and what a difference that made.

We walked to The Cricketers for lunch just around the corner; it was a bit of a wait for lunch that involved 2 drinks but it was a much welcomed break in-between works in progress.  It was such a lovely day that I wished that I was somewhere else and wasn’t in my scrubs.  We prepped ready for painting and finally downed tools around 4pm feeling absolutely done in. How old are we? Once upon a time, me and Phil would have worked until sunset but sadly those days are long gone, especially for Phil.

I was upset to receive a text from Sue to say that her dad had taken a turn for the worse and that she and Brian were flying home the following day.  This was our biggest fear when we flew out to Corfu and unfortunately a fear that turned into reality for Sue.  She was only on day 5 of a 2 week holiday. I really felt for her especially as it was me that persuaded her to go. Her dad is being treated in MKG for pneumonia and is scheduled to be transferred to Willen Hospice today.

Yesterday I had planned to go down to see mum in Melton but I switched days and am going down today.  Instead Phil & decided to finish work in the flat.  It made sense because Phil is meeting the agent today to hand over keys.  I was up early and working at the flat by half past seven, Phil arrived before half eight so he wasn’t that far behind.  We went to BM to get some fixtures and fittings and also picked up a vacuum packed double mattress from Dreams.  Then it was a whole morning of toil.

I painted the second bedroom then touched up with white in the hall, landing and lounge.   If I was being really particular, I probably would have painted the whole flat from top to bottom but there was just no time.  Phil put together the double bed and fitted a new toilet seat.  He also drilled down the stainless steel door wells because they’d all come loose.  The final job was to make up the bed, hoover all round and then we were more or less finished.  There are still a few bits to do; if time I will go back and re gloss all of the door frames and doors because they are a little too yellow for my liking. I also need to paint the garden fence and Phil says that he would like to hire a rug doctor and clean all the carpets.  This shouldn’t take long and at least now the flat is ready for viewing.

We had lunch at an Indian-cum-Sri Lankan restaurant in Oldbrook called Planet Dosa just opposite it from Lidl’s.   We didn’t know of the restaurant and just stumbled on it by chance.  Phil had the chicken jalfrezzi and I went for the chicken tikka masala along with lemon rice, a pashwari naan for Phil and some poppadum’s as a starter.  Well worth a visit but just be aware that they don’t have an alcohol licence.  Phil asked if you could bring your own for a corkage fee if we were to visit another time but the owner didn’t really know what we were talking about.  Never mind it was still a very nice lunch.

What a beautiful day it was yesterday and one where I felt I should have been strolling round the lake rather than painting walls but hey ho.  I did feel sorry for the MK marathon runners; it can’t have been much fun for them running in such heat.  I did spot the runners here and there as I drove around MK yesterday and had thought it would have been nice to go to the stadium to support them but it just didn’t happen.  Well done to Vanessa though, who ran in in 5.11 hrs. 

I managed to catch up with Sue yesterday afternoon for a cup of tea and a holiday-cum-life debrief.  She arrived home at half past two on Monday morning and was at the hospital visiting her dad at 9am.  He is on an IV drip of antibiotics and there is a slim chance that this will clear the infection but it is unlikely.  Very sad but at least she is home and can be there for him. Sue is sporting a great tan after only 4 days.  We chatted whilst she did her ironing but understandably she was very down.  Very down, very tired and very sad about her dad.

I have to post and publish and get going.  I am off to Melton to spend the day with mum. I spoke to her last night and she has a list of domestics for me which is absolutely fine, I am not one to sit on my bum, I much prefer to be busy.  Plus it helps her and saves her weary bones and also it passes the time of day.  If I was a really good daughter-in-law then I’d prepare and take down lunch but I just haven’t had time.  Plus the fact that I am supposed to be on a diet, detox and gym regime which just hasn’t happened. Oh well maybe next week when things get back to normal.  What’s normal?  Certainly not me for sure!

Happy Holidays

I went away to Greece with a sad and heavy heart.  There were a couple of reasons; firstly I was worried that something would happen to mum and dad and we wouldn’t be able to help them.  And secondly I was very concerned about Sue.  Her dad was recently diagnosed with lung cancer and further tests showed that it had spread to his bones and unlike George, he was in great pain. I don’t suppose there was much that I could do for Sue’s dad but I would have liked to have been there for her if she needed me.  But Phil needed a break and we flew away on the basis that if anything happened we would fly straight home.

I was pleasantly surprised by Mareblue Beach Resort in Agios Spyridon.  TripAdvisor reviews were not favourable but unbeknown to us, the hotel had been bought out and the new owners had done a complete makeover during the winter months. The room was basic but clean and comfortable; it even had tea making facilities which is always a bonus for me.  If I was to have a tiny gripe it would be that our balcony hardly got any sunshine during the day but we have a good view of the ocean.

As all-in buffets go, then I’d probably say that the food at Mareblue was some of the best I’ve experienced.  We managed to find something to eat every day although I’m not sure I could have hacked it a second week.  The entertainment was cheesy but good in a strange way and surprisingly enough, we went out every single night.  I particularly enjoyed the Greek Night and I rather think that we were the entertainment on some evenings! 

Phil thoroughly chilled out and spent every day, bar one, in bed.  He came out for breakfast, lunch and dinner but not once did he don a pair of swimming trunks or sunbathe by the pool.  It was just as well we hooked up with Holly & Shane who were great fun and didn’t seem to mind me gate crashing on them.   Quite flattering really, that a couple of 25 year olds were happy to hang out with us mad wrinklies.  We have swapped email addresses and have promised to keep in touch.  Holly said she will create a ‘drop box’ so we can swap photographs although I have no idea what this is.

I had a couple of mishaps whilst on holiday and troubles with technology.  One night I left my handbag in the pool bar, I realised as soon as we left and Phil went back down but it was nowhere to be seen.  I was up at the crack of dawn the following day and thankfully someone had handed it in behind reception.  Phew, that was a relief as my bag contained all of my money and credit cards.  I was very lucky but not so lucky was a bloke that I got chatting to who had lost his passport.

For some reason that even I cannot fathom, I didn’t take my little laptop away with me.  God knows why because I’d rather take my laptop over holiday clothes any day.  This meant a severe lack of internet access and also meant I couldn’t write a blog.  Phil reluctantly lent me his iPad on a couple of occasions but I don’t get on very well with it, give me a keyboard and a mouse any day.  I also forgot to bring my mobile phone charger and my Nokia died on our second day in Corfu.

Three days into our holiday, my new kindle paperwhite stopped working and I’m reluctant to reveal it was because of my own stupidity.  Phil brought me a kindle cover for Valentine’s Day but I’m forever taking it off.  One morning I was in bed reading my kindle and dozed off and my kindle fell out of my hands and onto the ceramic tiled floor.  It would have been fine if I’d had the cover on but when I picked it up, the screen was frozen.  I was so cross with myself and was buggered for reading material.  Luckily I managed to get some books from the reception library although they weren’t really to my taste.  Not much of a selection and most of the books were in German. 

This was a cheap break away for us and well worth the money. Being all inclusive made it very cheap although I have to say I do have to question all-inclusive deals.  Our hotel was in the middle of nowhere which wasn’t ideal and I couldn’t help but spot the number of signs for bars and tavernas.  When I looked they were nowhere to be seen and I did wonder whether it was because it was so early in the season.  But on further investigation, I realised that these places were ‘has beens’, obviously shut down because of hotels offering all-inclusive.  There is no doubt that A-I saves you money but what a shame it is at the expense of the local communities.  This goes throughout Europe.  I particularly noticed this in Tenerife although I didn’t give it a thought at the time.

But all in all, the holiday was a success.  My best day was the day we hired out the quad bikes which were great fun.  Personally I would have liked to have seen more of Corfu but that’s just me.  Coming home was not so much fun; late night flights and hanging around all day don’t do it for me.  It took an hour to get to the airport and once our bags were checked in, there wasn’t much to do. We had a drink in a bar outside and to be honest there wasn’t much time before we boarded. A courtesy bus picked us up at Stansted in no time, we collected our car and got back to the flat at half past midnight.

I felt sorry for Phil because he had to drive down early to mum and dads on Tuesday morning; he had a quick shower and was on the M1 before half past seven. The reason he had to go early was because he had arranged a meeting with the social services and they were due to arrive at half past nine.  I woke up on Tuesday morning with a really swollen eye lid.  In fact, the right side of my face was also swollen.  My eye was painful and I felt very peculiar.  At first I thought that maybe a mossie had bitten me on the eye but then I remembered having suffered the same thing a few years ago when we lived in the kebab flat. 

On that occasion, over the course of a day, my face puffed and the right side came out in deep bruising.  Thankfully this time I didn’t have any bruising but my eye was painful and I could hardly see out of it, not only that I felt really unwell. One minute I was boiling hot and the next I was whacking the heating up to 30.

Slowly I made my way through the washing, drying and ironing but it took me hours.  When I’d finished I popped over to Sue’s for a catch up over a cup of tea.  Poor girl had a rough week with her dad and her dilemma was whether to go away on holiday the following day.  My advice to her was pack your bag and go.  Her dad is in good hands in the care home and if anything happens she can always fly home.  I could see that she was struggling with her conscience and it wasn’t helped that on Tuesday evening, the carers, fearing her dad might have pneumonia, called out the paramedics.  Thankfully all was fine and Sue and Brian flew to Fuerteventura as planned.

On waking on Wednesday morning my face had swelled even more so I decided to call the doctors to get an emergency appointment. Phil thought it was hilarious that I looked like I’d been in a fight but it was no joke I can tell you.  I had to wait ages in the surgery but eventually I was seen by a very nice doctor.  He examined my eye and took my temperature which was high.  My eye wasn’t infected but apparently the condition that I am suffering with is called Edema.  He said also that I had a virus.  I came away with an antihistamine and some ibuprofen.  Funnily enough Holly took a funny turn on the way back and Phil said he wasn’t feeling great so I wonder if they too had the virus.

Jan phoned me and invited me (and Sue) over to supper on Wednesday night but I reluctantly had to decline.  At teatime, after taking 2 lots of pills, I was feeling a little better but then I dipped and went to bed at 8 o’clock.  Thankfully I was feeling ten times better this morning. Not 100% but the hot and cold feeling had gone and so I think had the temperature.  The swelling had gone done tremendously, not quite back to normal but my eye wasn’t painful and at least I could see out of it. At least I was able to go out to get some shopping.

I expected a big battle with Amazon when I phoned the help line to see if I could get my kindle replaced.  Luckily I’d been on the website and done a bit of research which served me well when they asked me if my kindle had been dropped, to which I emphatically replied that it certainly had not.  Liar liar, pants on fire Clairabella, but I don’t care.  My new kindle should be arriving sometime tomorrow.  Result!

Well I feel well enough to try out the gym whilst Phil is going to meet up with the agent that we are not so keen on and do the final check out on one of the Oldbrook properties.  These Australian tenants have been great and we have not had any problems with them over the last 4 years.  I wish all tenants could be like them but sadly they are not.  Hopefully the flat won't be in  too bad condition but of course I need to see for myself.  

The plan is to go to the caravan tomorrow and stay for a couple of days but if the flat needs work then I shall be tempted to stay in MK and get stuck in.  Time is money as they say and the sooner the flat is ready to market, then all the better. And so for my next project but I make no complaint. I think it’s high time I got up off my backside and did something useful for a change.

Phil April

Another month ends but at an inconvenient time this month.  Only just got home from our holiday in Corfu where I have been blogging since we arrived so you are all fed up of me.  I finished last month thinking that I would be starting work during April at Rexam again.  This hasn’t happened yet.  I know what their IT department are like and all they needed when I last visited them was the software installing.  They bought a new machine for me to use but by the time the software has been installed it will most likely be out of date and need an upgrade.  Maybe next month?

The main event this month was Sue’s birthday parties.  She had several but they were all great fun.  The first proper party, Jim and Shirley and Steve and Jan were also invited along with Claire and I and all Sue’s other friends.  We had a great night until near the end where drink got the better of some and a street fight developed.  The less said about that the better, but we didn’t get home until 4am.  Unfortunately, Sue’s second event was Sunday lunch, the following day, or rather the same day just a few hours later.  Sue had invited all her family and children along with Claire and I.  It was a nice way to sober up - or not.  In any case it seemed to delay the inevitable hang over that always follows these days.  Sue was meant to be having another party at Pink Punters but thankfully it was cancelled.

We also had a nice meal at the Blue Orchid at Aspley Guise.  This was the first time that Brian had been for a Thai meal but he seemed to enjoy it as much as anyone.  I chose to drive for this event as you can have too much of a good thing.

I also had my 6 month blood tests and results for all my ailments this month.  The results of my prostate PSA level was good.  It hasn’t changed since my treatment so they only need to see me once a year from now on.  They usually say that if there are no changes for 5 years then you are as safe as everyone else.  Three years to go for me but as the first two years have started so well its seems unlikely to change.  The results for my other ailment were not so good however.  Cant say Im surprised with all the parties and chocolate I have been eating.  I have to take another Metformin tablet to help reduce my blood sugar which means that I am now on the maximum of 4 tablets daily.  I have already cut down on my sugar intake but not on my calorie input.  Just waiting to get in the right frame of mind.  Not sure this will ever happen with our circumstances at the moment.  I also still have higher than normal blood pressure so I have been given yet another tablet to take for that.  Good job its a little one else it wouldn't fit in my weekly tablet dispenser.  However, my cholesterol, liver and kidneys are acceptable.  They must have been looking after themselves without much help from me.

My dad has had little change this month although he seems to have improved slightly this last week.  Mum has got worse and her sciatica has returned.  She is not sleeping as she should as dad is waking most of the night.  We took him to see his consultant on 19th for the results of the Xray and CT scan that we didn't even know he had been given.  While he was in hospital for investigation into his confusion, they found an 80mm diameter tumor on his kidney.  This was incidental and not the cause of his confusion.  They think he has had another mini stroke which has been causing his confusion.  His lethargy is from lake of heart function.  He doesn't have enough blood being pumped around his body.  He has gone from taking tablets for high blood pressure to taking them for low blood pressure.  He also only has 35% kidney function which they do not think is due to his tumor but rather to natural processes.  As he is in no pain at the moment and would not survive an operation it makes sense to do nothing but monitor him until things change.  He is more likely to live longer and happier than if they were to undertake invasive surgery, hard drugs or further traumatic investigations.  When we come back from our holidays we have a lady visiting mum to help fill in forms regarding help for her with dad.  They have already been told that there will be no financial help for continuing nurses help because they have more money than the threshold allowed.  Good job they have saved all their lives or they might have got it free.  Anyway, Claire will report on this or it will be in my May entry; probably both.

Regarding my Aunt Daphne’s financial advisor we have been to see a top barrister in London the other day.  He says that regarding her house trust, knowing what has happened and proving it are two different things.  It is not straight forward at this time because we have so little information to aid our case.  Regarding her late husband Les’s trust things are different and I have been able to obtain far more information because I am a trustee.  This is the one to pursue first and bring to a close.  According to the outcome of that trust we can re-evaluate the house trust at a later stage.  Unfortunately, as it is on the market it most probably will be sold and the money split.  However, it is possible to claim this money back at a later stage if any wrong doings can be proven.  I do have very good evidence regarding Les’s trust that criminal wrong doings have taken place and we have formed a strategy for our following actions.  It is time for Claire and I to regather our lives and take more of a back seat for now while the professionals work for us.  For as long as I am alive I will never completely let it drop until justice prevails.

It was nice to finish the month off with a holiday.  We were not expecting to be able to take it right until the last week so we hadn't arranged our transfers or parking.  Mum and dad have slotted into a routine which is pretty stable now and they still have the home help for another couple of weeks.  Looking back on this holiday it was great fun and great value for money but, as I have said before, All Inclusive doesn’t suit us.  We wouldn’t have booked it if it hadn’t been so cheap which is mainly due to it being all in so Im not complaining.  It just restricts you so much because you have more than enough food and drink in your hotel than you can manage so you are paying twice when you go anywhere outside.  If it hadn't been for the quad bike day we would have seen nothing but the inside of our hotel.  We should have hired a car for another day and visited Corfu Town and Paleokastritsa but it never seemed to happen.

We had two games of bingo which was fun and we decided to share any winning between Shane and Holly and ourselves.  On Saturday night at the pool bar Holly won so we all won.  Great at least it payed for our bingo cards.  It was quite good that night as they had a fire eater that also walked on broken glass and a bed of nails.  I think he was a relative beginner because we could smell singed pork during the act and he physically had to pull out the bed of nails from his body.

Our quad bike day will be the day that we all remember so I’n not quite sure why we don’t just bite the bullet a bit more and get out there.  Next time I will book a self catering and a car.  That way you don't have to wear a helmet.

The cave was quite good to see but difficult to get there and back.  My legs were still aching on the last day of our holiday.  We are not scheduled to get home until very late on Monday 29th and I have to drive to Melton on Tuesday morning early so I have scheduled this blog to come out while we travel home.  Maybe that way it will get a day before Claire writes her account of the same holiday and overwrites this.  I am really looking forward to getting back to normality as I am sick of eating and drinking all the time.  The three most memorable things of our holiday would have to be the Quad’s, cave and our meal at Junipers; all of which we did when we put our hand in our pocket and got outside the hotel.
We are very close to Albania where we are situated.  The mountains across the Aegean is Albania.  In fact I get a better phone signal from Albania than I do from Greece.  Trouble is the tariff is 28p per minute for Greece and £1.49 a minute for Albania.  I had to switch my phone off because I keep getting silly advertising texts all the time which are costing me a fortune.

Well, next month no holidays booked and I should start back to work again.  But then again, I said that at the end of last month.  I hope we get some reasonable weather so we can spend some time in the caravan.  Have a good one!